Train up a child in the way he should go,
Even when he is old he will not depart from it. Proverbs 22:6
Yesterday we began a three-day round of devotionals devoted
to mothers in honor of Mother’s Day coming up this Sunday. In review we learned that the top three
stressors of mothers are according to author Karol Ladd:
1.
House
Beautiful: wanting the house to always look clean and nice.
2.
Perfect
Kids: wanting to maintain a stellar family image.
3.
Need
Nabbers: feeling needed by everyone at the same time
Can you imagine living day in and day out with an older
person continually demanding that we look act, and perform perfectly? Sometimes that is exactly what we do with our
children. We place expectations on them
that we would have a hard time living up to and we may not even realize
it. Put your priorities in order and
think about what is the most important thing.
Here are some ideas:
- Make a list of character
qualities you want your children to learn.
- Focus on character more
than image or achievement.
- Work together with your
kids to form realistic goals.
- Realize that “looking”
precious is not as important as “being”
precious.
- Consider disappointments
as opportunities to learn and do better next time.
Getting to the Root
of the Problem: If you struggle with
wanting your kids to maintain an image of perfection, the real problem may be
your own issue with pride. Other
struggles you may be experiencing could be expectations that are too high,
comparisons with others, issues from your own past, caring too much about what
people think, or living vicariously through your children.
We all want the best for our children. We actually want better for them than what we
have. Sometimes therein lies the problem. We may try to live vicariously through our
children. You may have struggled in
sports as a child, but by signing your son up for baseball, you can relive some
of the passion of the sport through him.
Except your son may not have the passion or the talent for baseball. Or he may have real talent for baseball but no
passion, which will really drive you crazy!
It is hard to let them be who they are instead of making them who we
want them to be. God has a plan for
their lives and as a parent we must have faith in Him to lead them and faith
that they will follow.
Give your expectations for your children to the Lord and ask
Him to direct their paths and yours. Work
on what is important like their character and their relationship with the
Lord. Be willing to take that picture of
perfection off the wall and lay it at Jesus’ feet, realizing that kids are not
perfect, and neither are moms.
Scripture to Claim:
For am I now seeking the favor of men, or
of God? Or am I striving to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I
would not be a bond-servant of Christ. Galatians 1:10
