Wednesday, January 27, 2021

Losing Control

 Wednesday, January 27, 2021

God is our refuge and strength, A very present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth should change And though the mountains slip into the heart of the sea; Though its waters roar and foam, Though the mountains quake at its swelling pride. Selah; Psalms 46:1-3
The nations made an uproar, the kingdoms tottered; He raised His voice, the earth melted. The LORD of hosts is with us; The God of Jacob is our stronghold. Selah Psalms 46:6-7

Losing Control
We all like to be in control. If we are people who are used to being in control, it is very hard for us to sit quietly and let someone else run the ship. However there are very few things we can really control. As Christians, we know this is a false sense of security because if we believe in God, and that He is sovereign, and that He is over all, then we know that we really have little control over the outcome of things. The circumstances that we cannot control can cause us fear and distress. 

We can control our own choices and our own behavior, but we cannot control other people or the choices they make. This is the hardest part of being a parent. We do our part, but when it comes down to it, our grown children have to make their own choices. We don’t want them to have to suffer from the consequences of wrong choices. Sometimes what causes us fear is what might happen to us, or someone we love, because of another person’s choices. We can sit and imagine scenarios all day and all night. This doesn't fix anything and it only makes us anxious and fearful. 

Anywhere we feel a loss of control, insecurity or fear can immobilize us. - Van Houser

When things feel out of control around us, we tend to start grabbing for places we can gain some control, or we freeze and do nothing out of fear. This fear we feel when we are not in control can take over our lives, consuming our minds with thoughts of all that could happen. It keeps us awake at night. It steals our focus from our more than capable, all mighty, maker of the universe God. It affects us physically and can even take years off our lives. 

Even when we think we are in control it is an illusion. We can force behavior in someone (a small someone) but we cannot change the heart with control and the heart is the heart of the matter. We tend to label our controlling behavior as “protection” or something else because what we are really feeling is fear. Fear is why we try to control people and events - because we are afraid of what could happen. It is not that we want to rule over someone, it comes from fear of the unknown. 

Men still believe they can change other men through control which only creates more rebellion.  
- Van Houser

Feeling like we are losing control of the circumstances of our lives causes fear and anger. We may feel we have no control due to medical reasons, or other reasons. Sometimes we feel that we have no control because we have no other choice. Other times we feel that we have no control because of other circumstances - like a pandemic - which has caused much fear in our lives. Media feeds our fear that we have no control. 

We agree with giving control to someone if we agree that there is danger or a threat. Then we want someone to take control who knows what to do and will protect us. We have a Heavenly Father who knows the best way to handle every problem and circumstance we will ever face. His ways and answers are perfect and when we learn that giving Him the control is the BEST thing, we are happy to hand it over to Him. Sometimes this is a hard learned lesson!  

One thing we have that no one can take away is our ability to pray and when we feel that we have no control we need to pray - and let it go! I literally have to go through the motions of giving it to God. I have to open my hands and give it to Him and focus on the trust I have in Him and the victory over fear that can be mine through Him. When I can focus on Him and not all the “what-ifs,” I can have peace in my heart knowing that He is in control, and not only is He in control, but He is working! He is doing something. He is always working things out for our good because He loves us. So when we feel that we have lost control, we can trust a God that is always in control. 

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