Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Proper Prevention Focus

Train up a child in the way he should go, Even when he is old he will not depart from it. 
Proverbs 22:6

I have been asked by parents in recent days to share some of the insights I have gained in my work with the prevention of child and teen negative consequence behavior.  I have decided to take the opportunity of our daily devotional to share.  My prayer is that if you are not a parent or are a grandparent you may find this material worthwhile to share with others. 

Our world is a dangerous place for our children and grandchildren.  While concern for their protection is a major focus for all caregivers, the most important action is a preventive one.  Teaching prevention techniques nationally, my highest objective was to refocus parents, grandparents and others involved in raising children on the children and not the problems.

Drugs, gangs, sexual threats, computer threats, and other dangers loom in the darkness out of the control or vision of caregivers.  Repeatedly I shared the following: 
Prevention is NOT
keeping drugs away from kids and kids away from drugs,
keeping sex away from kids and kids away from sex or
keeping guns away from kids and kids away from guns.

Prevention IS
EQUIPPING A CHILD TO WALK THROUGH A 
DRUG-FILLED, SEX-CRAZED VIOLENT WORLD SAFELY.

With that in mind, what is one of the most important attributes of a child who can withstand the onslaught of their environment?  It is the ability to make good decisions.

Parents dedicated to developing only obedience and control fail to recognize the fact they will not be present when important decisions are made in a child’s life to give directions to obey.  A child who is not secure and confident in their own decision-making skills will remain vulnerable to the control of others.  

God’s commands to parents clearly focus on the responsibility to equip not control.  Training a child is far more difficult than controlling.  It involves teaching discernment and communication skills.  It requires knowing the child’s personality strengths and weaknesses and how they will affect their life experience.  All said, it demands the training of the parent as well as the child.

Before sharing principles and ideas on decision-making, it is important to consider how Jesus worked with His disciples.  Knowing that He would not be with them forever, He did not attempt to control them.  Understanding the power of the tempter and their personal weaknesses, He did more than list requirements and demand obedience.  He taught them.  He repeated the lessons over and over in a variety of settings and ways.  While disappointed that they did not understand, He did not demean them.  Surely, we can learn from Him the importance of becoming a life trainer for those we love.

Except we understand the importance of training and learning,
we will continue to expend our energies on the things immediate
to correct behavior but not so effective in changing behavior.

What does this mean for our lives today?  As children of God and disciples of Christ, possibly we have misunderstood the plan of God for our protection.  The very term “disciple” connotes the responsibility to learn.  Failure to learn translates into personal weakness and failure.  In other words, we are not “equipped” and remain vulnerable to the world.  Get the picture?

Scripture to Claim:
Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.  Ephesians 6:4

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