What mother hasn’t wished she had four extra hands and not to mention at least one clone of herself? It seems at times that everyone wants something from you at the same time. All of these needs pulling on you at one time can be exhausting. As mothers we love our children and want to help when we can, but the constant tug can drain us of our energy. Karol Ladd, best-selling author, suggests these helpful ideas:
- Acknowledge your child’s need by looking him or her in the eye and speaking kindly.
- Decide if it is an immediate need or one that can wait.
- Delegate what you can. Teach older kids to do their own laundry, make their own lunches, and assign specific chores for them to help with around the house.
- Encourage your children to be patient in waiting for your help.
- Remember that it’s not healthy for your kids to have you at their every beck and call.
- If you have many kids with many needs, seek out additional help.
- Realize that this stage in your family life will pass. Ask the Lord for strength for the moment and for the day.
- Check your list of responsibilities. Reprioritize, see if anything on it is unnecessary or can wait.
Getting to the Roots
If you feel like screaming at the constant pressure of meeting the needs of your family, maybe your emotions are being influenced by stress in your life, the number of people constantly needing you, your unwillingness to delegate, impatience, or “supermom” syndrome (feeling as though you must be the one to solve everyone’s problems). Now is the time to steal a few moments for you. Take some time to pray, read a book, take a quick nap or a long bath. Sometimes it only takes a short amount of time to rejuvenate yourself. Then you are as good as new.
Set a Good Example – Your children need to hear the words please don’t interrupt, or I’ll be with you in just a minute, please wait patiently. They need to learn good manners, they need to respect your time, and they need to see you take some time for yourself. It is very important to refill your spiritual cup and keep your emotions balanced. It is healthy for you to say no sometimes, and it is ok! Your children will value you and respect you more when they see you value and respect yourself.
Being a mother provides me with something I crave, something I need, something that completes me. It comes first in everything. It surrounds every other aspect of my life...and I'm told it will continue forever, no matter the age of the children. You see, once you become a mother it is forever a part of your identity, but not your wholeidentity. Don’t forget all the other things you are. Don’t completely put aside every hobby and talent you have – that God has given you. He made you a mother, yes, but he also made you a wife, friend, artist, writer, etc… Take time for yourself. Renew your spirit, be ministered to; fill your cup. After all, if you have nothing left; if you are drained completely, what can you draw from to give back to your family? Delegate responsibilities teach your children to respect your private time and look to God for wisdom.
Scripture to Claim:
Only give heed to yourself and keep your soul diligently, so that you do not forget the things which your eyes have seen and they do not depart from your heart all the days of your life; but make them known to your sons and your grandsons.
Deuteronomy 4:9
