Tuesday, December 2, 2025
How Do We Get A Bad Attitude?
During the holidays it can be especially easy to have a bad attitude. We can become disgruntled because things are not like we expected them to be. Our beautifully imagined family dinner ends in a full blown argument. Maybe someone forgot to bring the desert. It can be spurred on by many things when our hearts and desires are not focused on God.
Sunday Pastor Jim gave us an example of how a bad attitude starts and grows.
Misaligned heart/desires – When we have unmet or unrealistic expectations they can cause our perceptions of people or situations to be distorted. One thing is not the way we want it, so everything is wrong. We may blame others. Family members are fighting, the turkey is dry, and the tree is crooked. Our hearts and desires are not focused on God and what is really important.
Negative Thought Cycles – Our misaligned heart/desires lead us to have negative thoughts about the situations we are in or the people we are around.
Rationalization of behavior – Our misaligned heart/desires and negative thoughts can lead to rationalizing our own bad behavior. We may believe that we deserve something (such as eating something or buying ourselves something) because we are upset, or that someone else deserves something (such as something bad to happen to them) because of their actions or upsetting behavior.
Poor Communication – A misaligned heart and desires lead to negative thoughts, which lead to rationalization of behavior. Next on the downward spiral is poor communication. When we have a bad attitude, we may begin to blame and shame ourselves and others and use sarcasm in a negative way.
Impact On Others - Our bad attitudes will always affect others. When I was a child I was in a dance class where the teacher would always say, “What you feel within, you give without.” It must have made an impression on me to still be able to remember that, and it is so true. Whether we want to or not, what is on the inside will spill out to those around us, even if it is just the look on our face or our disposition.
When we have a bad attitude we can miss some of the greatest blessings of God. When our heart and desires are misaligned, we can miss the whole season – and it goes so fast. Most importantly we will miss the reason for the season. No matter how many Christmases we have seen, God can always show us some miracle of his story we never noticed before if we are focusing on him.
This season we should take care to be sensitive to those we come across or those we know in our lives who seem to be a Scrooge. We never know what is going on in someone else’s heart or what circumstances they may be in that is causing their bad attitude. The holidays are hard for a lot of people. For some, it is easier to stay in a bad attitude than to face the pain that comes with the season. Maybe is it is a broken relationship with family, the loss of a loved one, or just being alone during a time of the year when the focus is on gatherings with family and loved ones. Remember when you encounter someone who has a bad attitude to love them like Jesus and point them to him with your words and actions.
