Hear, O Israel! The LORD is our God, the LORD is one! You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. These words, which I am commanding you today, shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your sons and shall talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down and when you rise up. Deuteronomy 6:4-7
The vital responsibility of passing on our faith requires having proper and effective skills in communication. Each generation carries the torch of faith to the next. Here are some tips from my book Watch Out for the Snakes that may assist you in being a more effective communicator. You may want to pass these along to your children or friends. They are very important to communication.
Basic Tools for Effective Communication (Part 1)
Be a good listener. Listening is the greatest skill a good communicator possesses. Pay attention while your child is speaking. Don't allow your mind to wander to other things such as problems at work, dinner preparations, or the evening news on television. Don't Interrupt. Listen carefully to what is being said and try to understand your child's concerns. Don't prepare what you will say while your child is speaking.
Initiate communication when needed. If the child does not tell you about problems you know exist, take the initiative and ask questions about what is going on at school or in other activities. Don't allow anger at what you hear to end the discussion. If necessary, take a 5-minute break to calm down before continuing. Take note of what your child is NOT saying, too.
Be aware of your own and your child's facial expressionsand body language. Actions often do speak louder than words. Be aware of what your eyes, hands, and body are communicating. Is your child nervous or uncomfortable -- frowning, drumming fingers, tapping a foot, looking at the clock? Or does your child seem relaxed -- smiling, looking you in the eyes? Reading these signs may provide more information about how the child is really feeling than the words that are said.
Acknowledge what your child is saying. Be an “active” listener. During a conversation, move your body forward if you are sitting, touch a shoulder if you are walking, or nod your head and make eye contact.
Reserve judgment until your child has finished and has asked you for a response. Resist the temptation to give an opinion on every topic. Do not take notes while they are speaking. Sometimes your child just needs to talk about a problem in order to see how to fix it. Allowing your child to arrive at a solution by himself or herself helps to build self-confidence and decision-making skills.
Scripture to Claim:
This you know, my beloved brethren. But everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger; for the anger of man does not achieve the righteousness of God. James 1:19-20
